What are dreams about? How do we come to terms with our fears? Is there something going while we are sleeping that we should all know about?
The following conversation is merely an approximation and represents the gist, not the exact content, of a real IM conversation held some years ago. The dream that followed represents a pattern, a dream-type that seems to be more than just the recounting of the day’s lessons:
Slightly-tilted Girl: Do you have bad dreams?
Rahkyt: No. I haven’t had a bad dream in years.
Slightly-tilted Girl: Must be nice. Sometimes I have the kind that makes me wake up screaming and shouting with fear.
Rahkyt: I don’t recall ever having that type of dream. I am able to control my dreams.
Slightly-tilted Girl: Oh. Must be nice.
Rahkyt: It is. LOL
Rahkyt: Remember when we had that conversation about fear, and I said that I didn’t have any?
Slightly-tilted Girl: Yeah.
Rahkyt: Well, I do. I’m afraid for my children and their future. And I’m also afraid of what will happen when my parents die.
Slightly-tilted Girl: Those are good ones. I am, too.
Approximately 6 hours later:
It was a twilight world, lush and verdant, the sound of strange whooping and supersonic twitters indicative of abundant and supernatural life. I wasn’t alone. With me were children and a few other companions, at least one of which was a guide. I cannot recall their faces in the haze of the dream-state, but I seemed to possess certain knowledge that the children were my own progeny. We followed a small, neat road that gradually declined into what seemed to be a deeper and darker region of the forest.
The trees loomed closer as we descended, turning the twilight into almost-night, and then we were through, into a circular clearing, within which squatted a surreal, menacing compound. A low, sprawling house lay at the opposite end of the clearing, its expanse disappearing beneath the canopy of the surrounding forest. Numerous, dark windows emanated sentience and the house seemed to have a presence that was aware of our arrival. As the road wended across the clearing, to the left of us was a caged enclosure, oval shaped and slightly derelict. The links were rusted and vines twisted their way through them in places. Within the cage was a wooden structure, a small pool and, something else.
It possessed what can only be described as an exaggerated human shape. If the thing had been standing, it would have been over three meters tall, but as it was stalking the close confines of the cage on all fours, its size was only slightly less terrifying. He was obviously male and quite pale-skinned, with lanky, dirty-blonde hair that hung over a face dominated by a pronounced, crooked nose. As I observed at the creature, I realized that there was something very strange about it and then, with a shock, realized what it was. Its body was inverted. Instead of its back facing the ground, two, pale pink nipples, encrusted with dirt stared at the sky. Its genital region was inadequately covered by a torn cloth of indeterminate color. Its knees and elbows were bent skyward, giving the creature a spider-like appearance. Conversely, its head was situated in a normal manner, chin toward the ground, head swaying from side to side and eyes staring forward dully, seeming not to notice our encroachment within its territory.
The words, ‘That is my son’, startled me out of my amazement and I turned toward the main house to find a short, old man with dense white hair covering his head and face standing close to us. He wore a white suit and thick, black glasses. His aura was kind, but exuded a disturbed, nervous aspect that washed over me, only adding to my increasing dread.
More conversation followed and our small party followed the old man into the house, where the details of the dream grow blurred. The interior was dark and dense with possessions, books, curios, and weird statues filled small rooms punctuated by numerous doors leading further into the maze-like house. We had dinner, some discussion regarding the purpose of our visit - which had to do with procuring something, I believe - and then I and the children were shown to our room.
I slept, and was awakened - during this dream - by a clear feeling of sluggishness and alarm. My eyes opened to the sight of the creature looming over me, placing some sort of clear, plastic cup filled with a white, gaseous substance over my mouth.
The sheer stench of the thing was accompanied by a piercing sensation of hatred and evil, its dark, black eyes burning with an unadulterated malevolence. Sneering, slavering bile flowed from its cavernous maw and it turned from me, toward my children, its harmful intent apparent. An abject feeling of terror overcame me and I was animated by this primal urge toward protection and, as the energy built within me, my state of perception changed.
It was at this point that I became aware that I was dreaming lucidly and, as the energy surged within my astral form, in the real world I kicked, my legs twisting the bed sheets wildly askew and I could hear myself grunting in sheer terror, ‘uunhhh, uunhhh, uunhhh!’ as my torso rose slightly from the bed as well.
My wife’s voice, commanding me to ‘Stop that’, coincided with my eyes opening weakly, witnessing, directly above me and to the left, the retreat of a wispy, ethereal figure that mirrored the appearance of the terrifying creature of my dreams, its arms held out towards me, beckoning, or, more probably, releasing. The presence quickly evaporated into the darkness of the room as I came more fully into myself, leaving behind only a malevolent and wry amusement that permeated my conscious mind. I said nothing in response to my wife - being slightly embarrassed by my sleeping outburst - and I turned to face the wall and window of our bedroom, my mind whirling with the implications. I was soon asleep again, the rest of the nights dreamings lost in the depths of my subconscious mind.
Was this a conscious visit on the part of some otherworldly power, or was this just a subconscious fear manifesting during my dream-state? Was this creature a real Being that came to me that night in order to directly refute my earlier statement, made in a proud and vain manner; and, if so, why? Who sent it? What did this mean?
Upon awakening this morning, the memory of this dream and my embarrassing conduct made me think that something is changing in the world around me. The last few nights have been very weird, as far as my dream-life has been concerned. I have been waking at odd intervals and having short, fleeting dreams that are quite vivid in nature, although most recede into the haze of the night. But a few have been memorable and, without making any extra effort, I have been remembering them the next day with very little effort, although that has been very difficult for me to do for years. I don’t have a history of night-terrors during the dream-state, so the coincidence of having this dream the same night that I had that IM conversation was absolutely too much to just pass off as insignificant.
During the last little while, the days have reflected the tumultuous behavior of my dream-life, being alternately sluggish and confused, my tongue belabored, my mind racing from here to there, with concentration difficult to achieve. A sense of overwhelming emotivity, short tempered interactions, emotions rising from nowhere and subsiding just as quickly, a yearning for peace and release from the pressures of the daily grind have all combined in what seems to be a crucible of time and space leading me directly to this place in my life.
I realize that my primary fears are directly connected to my children, and to their safety, and that, somehow, the energy matrix that were all connected to at a subconscious level is consciously working to bring our fears and desires forth, into the light of our direct awareness. At least, it seems so for me. Encompassing those fears and recognizing them is the first step to denying them power over our lives and moving past them into a true state of fearlessness. But the difficulty of doing so hardly needs mentioning. This is an important stage of self-evolution, related directly - to those familiar with Star Wars lore - to the example of Luke Skywalker facing himself in the Guise of Darth Vader in the Cave of Destiny, on Yoda’s planet. After doing so, he was able to direct The Force and truly achieve his destiny as a Jedi Knight.
Releasing this fear, again, is so hard to do, because it means releasing my children to their own destinies, not fearing for them and trusting the Multiverse to take care of them. For many of us, this sounds crazy. We can’t even conceive of seeming to not care for our loved ones, or want to protect them, because the logical continuation of this thought process, or transformed perception of reality, seems cold and callous to most people as exemplified by the question, ‘if somebody raped and killed your daughter and you saw that person and had the opportunity to do something to them, would you?’
For me, right now, I would be highly tempted, very highly tempted, to kill them, straight up, because my fear-complex and connection to my children would almost automatically kick in and the rage that I felt at one of their deaths would be almost too much to bear. But, for the individual who has passed the fear complex and has moved into a state of continuous Universal Love would not do so, would have compassion for this individual and proceed accordingly, being beholden to a Higher Law of Love and Understanding.
If given the choice to consciously evolve, knowing that it would require you to let go of all of your emotional ties to your friends, family and everything else you hold dear, would you choose to do so?
I‘ll leave it here. But dreams are important and have meaning. These questions are the very stuff of life itself. Even though they’re difficult to talk about, to admit, or to answer in our own minds, there is nothing more important in our lives than the condition of our souls, and the future that we choose to manifest and live.